January 2012
a cat walked on my car and left paw prints on it
I’m not even mad I love cats
Alvin keeps saying “winning”
I think he just discovered Charlie Sheen for the first time
I’m learning how to use nunchucks
Alvin’s dad is pro at it
I have too much confidence
I keep saying I will rise above them twirling nunchucks
I think Alvin said he was coming over after he finished work and I agreed to go out to the clubs
but I don’t know if I made that conversation up or not
he might not be coming over later because we never spoke about this
is there even an Alvin
oh god
I need to start writing things down
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I’ve never actually seen a few good men
I don’t know what it’s about
my mission to sue all humans will be made into a movie one day
jack nicholson will reprise his role as ‘you can’t handle the truth guy’ in the scene where everyone can’t handle the truth
when I graduate uni I’m going to sue all humans for existing
even me
especially me
but especially everyone else
oh you’ll all get it
the best part about australia day is double time and a half
that’s it, really
nobodyeversaysitaly:
I don’t have anything against Australia Day. I just wish that dudes wouldn’t use it as an excuse to stop wearing a shirt in the middle of town.
I’m fairly sure the first fleet wore clothes while they invaded settled this country, so why can’t you while you celebrate it? “Is this what I invaded settled Australia for? A bunch of drunk, shirtless young riff raff?” Capitain...
The Easy Drake Oven™
ryanhatesthis:
suburbantragic:
“Your cookies will come out soft as hell.”
FUCK
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Shit Murderers Say
mrdavidgordon:
“I’m gonna kill you.”
oh wait, now I see the funny side.
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whenever I see that shirt with that picture of Kanye West on it that you could get from jay jays I think it’s a picture of him walking on the moon and I always ask why are you on the moon Kanye
but he never answers because he’s on the moon and he can’t hear me
I actually wish uni would hurry up and start.
Need something to occupy my mind.
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welcometofaerieland replied to your photo: he just keeps making this face it’s weird
HE’S STONED
yet again
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This is Baldrick, a pointless peasant.
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Vincent crawled inside the printer and ripped up all the paper and got ink everywhere
he’s so adorable
why do I keep hearing basshunter everywhere
it’s not even 2009
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I love having austar.
Underage and Pregnant is on. They’re trying to raise their child on the pocket money they get every week. This girl looks 12.
True story.
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avodka-kedavra replied to your photo: Can’t wait to pay for all this.
Have you thought about renting?
I had not. I shall look into that, thank you :).
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I have way too many shirts
what is with all of the shirts
I have like fifty shirts and a tenth of that in pants
pacify-eris:
I hate it when people get really pissy about the use of the word “literally.”
When I say someone is so hot that I am literally going to rip my eyeballs out, shove them in a blender and then smear the resulting goop all over my computer screen IT IS NOT A FIGURE OF SPEECH.
I am LITERALLY doing all of those things. I LITERALLY did them. It is 1000% REALITY. I no longer have eyes....
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